12.01.2005

Today, I need to escape subtlety.
Subtlety is a nice way to hide one’s foolishness until it comes back and gives you a taste of its own medicine.
Down with letters to no one. Posts addressed to a postee that can or can not be addressing me. These spiraling lies make me nauseous because we are people running in fear, making stupid barriers, reinventing dull reality, trying to break away from daily routine.
Maybe one day I will meet you and it will be nothing like words. No magic, just reality. As dull and uninteresting as it can be or as full and interesting as it can also be.
And even though the you may seem as elusive as ever, you know who you are. I can’t be any more obvious. Well I can, but what fun would that be...
And I confess, I was and am intimidated as hell.
And there is only so much electric impulses can communicate.
It's always amazing to see how subtle my "unsubtlety" is.
Tired of the absurd? Today we escape.
Next chapter, please.

7 Comments:

Anonymous DrunkenWanderer said...

how i enjoy wandering your thoughts...

6:47 PM  
Blogger laRoi said...

i just started a blog here as well. i'll save my daily mundanities for livejournal, but here i will begin to compile my word sketches.

perhaps at some point you might be able to teach me how to navigate this thing?

7:22 PM  
Blogger Y said...

cool. I am always intrigued by reading your sketches. Blog is not much different from livejournal really. I seriously doubt you would need help navigating this.

As for my thoughts, they are mainly rather simple. Weird, but they all come down to the same thing. I just overcomplicate matters too much, wordplayed, mindplayed, and obviously confused myself and another unnecessarily.
I hate when people mistake my writing for who I am though. It can only be a part of me at a particular time. I feel that writing can't ever reflect who anyone is... Words remain permanently fixed in a piece of writing while we are constantly changing beings. It is all such lies. I think writing is never truthful and to seek truth in writing can only lead to failure.
...And yet there is still this gnawing urge to always scribble down thoughts anyways...agh...
Y.

12:12 AM  
Blogger laRoi said...

i know what you mean, but while words remain permanently fixed, their meaning doesn't have to. i'd even go so far as to say that it never really does. meaning changes as we do. so perhaps in dancing on the margins of definitions we find a truth we didn't even know we were seeking. perhaps in this way we can become our own teachers.



and...um...i don't know how to edit a piece after i've posted it.

also, are there communities on blogger?

4:16 PM  
Blogger Y said...

It's true meaning doesn't have to stay static in writings, but the meaning will change differently from the way the author will. And even if the words were "to have their own life", a piece of writing can only have meaning if there is someone else to give it meaning: they still can't possibly be a decent representation of a person's thoughts, at most it can be what others want to see that person's thoughts as. (at least I definetely hope that my vagaries on blog don't reflect who I am as a person)
***
To edit a piece you sign in, click on your blog title, then you have a history of all your posts, click edit.
I find that blog is not a very community based system. However, it's great if you want to start a joined writing site...where many members can write and contribute to the same blog and openly discuss/criticize each other's writing. You can mediate the site and invite "members." In addition, blog gives more flexibility in how you want your page to look like, if you're into the whole html/programming thing that is.

8:13 PM  
Blogger A. D. said...

How very true.

Words can make you an absurd protagonist in someone else's imagination. And it's funny that we all live actual lives at actual desks and carry on fretting about school and junk. And yet, behind the absurdity and the exaggeration there are sometimes definite glimpses of an actual person, someone you might have met a few times and spoken with: and the real test isn't the anecdotes they tell but how they tell it. Words impoverish that; you can't get flustered on the internet. But they also let use be the protagonists we wish we were, skipping Monday through Thursday and getting right into the meat of Friday-Saturday. Am I reading you correctly? (Or: it's brutal honesty with a lot left out.)

And subtlety has nothing on ambiguity.

Cheers to all those who work on self-overcoming!

1:04 AM  
Blogger Y said...

uh hu...words seem to be the perfect tool to project a mildly(*cough*) exaggerated character onto an actual person, making it just barely believable to allow us to keep on dreaming.....of course until the absurdity becomes really absurd and the ambiguities consume us. But I smile at the silliness of it all. It's kind of like hearing the tingling sound of a triangle.
I'm not sure if it's healthy at all. Most likely not. Healthy things aren't necessarily good for us anyways.

I always preferred Sunday mornings.

11:42 AM  

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